the older I get, the less patience I have for the idea that a story is inherently complex or #deep because it has a bittersweet or tragic ending, or that people who like for things to end on a happy note are simple-minded weaklings who can’t handle harsh realities and mature storytelling.
Look, shit is fucked. Life is a mess. Sometimes it’s a struggle to even come up with a reason to go on. I respect that media should be realistic and true to life, but fucking sue me, for once I just want to see the bad guys eat shit while the good guys ride off into the sunset and never have anything bad happen to them ever again. I don’t care if it’s unrealistic or implausible, that’s why it’s a fucking story. I have enough tragedy in my real life, thanks.
I thought the whole point of storytelling was to escape our harsh reality or to teach lessons, and if a story doesn’t make me laugh or make me smile or make me feel good while I read it then I think it’s a terrible story. I don’t care if it is written by Stephen King or George R. R. Martin or any author the general public views as a great author, if a book doesn’t have a happy ending and doesn’t make me feel happy then it fucking sucks. Fuck everyone who says stories need to be dark, I don’t enjoy all the angst and I have no idea why anyone would like it. You’ll get to experience a lot of sad and traumatizing things in real life so why the hell in the world of storytelling, where everything is made up, would you choose themes so dark and so close to reality? It doesn’t make any sense.
The Titanoboa, is a 48ft long snake dating from around 60-58million years ago. It had a rib cage 2ft wide, allowing it to eat whole crocodiles, and surrounding the ribcage were muscles so powerful that it could crush a rhino. Titanoboa was so big it couldn’t even spend long amounts of time on land, because the force of gravity acting on it would cause it to suffocate under its own weight.
I’m so glad they aren’t around
omg me too. I’m scared enough of 26 ft long anacondas. I’m so happy Megalodons, those giant sharks, aren’t alive either
Praise natural selection
I remember watching Walking with Beasts or something similar, or some British tv show about evolution
The subject was something like a 12 foot long water scorpion
I was so startled by its sudden appearance and narration that I yelped: “12 fucking feet?!?! I’m fucking glad it’s extinct!”
Dude, prehistory was home to some fucking TERRIFYING creatures. For some reason, everything back then was enormous and scary. Extinction doesn’t always have to be a bad thing!
And Poppy, what you saw was an arthropod known as Pterygotus (it was actually featured in Walking With Monsters). Not only was it as big (or maybe even bigger) than your average human, it had a stinger the size of a lightbulb. REALLY glad that bugger isn’t around anymore.
Also, Megalodon deserves to be mention again, because just hearing its name makes me want to never be submerged in water ever again.
GOD, I HATE THIS POST. HOW DO WE EVEN KNOW THAT SHIT ISN’T STILL AROUND? LURKING? EVOLVING? WE DON’T. WE DON’T KNOW SHIT ABOUT SHIT DOWN THERE. THE OCEAN IS A PRIMEVAL HELLSCAPE NIGHTMARE AND WE ALL JUST DIP OUR STUPID FRAGILE UNPROTECTED FETUS BODIES AROUND THE EDGES OF IT LIKE THAT’S NORMAL. FUCK THE OCEAN.
this is so relevant to my interests
It wasn’t just the predators. North Carolina was once home to giant ground sloths…
THAT IS A GODDAMNED LEAF-EATING SLOTH.
We’ve got a skeleton of one of these fuckers at the museum downtown, and man, just being NEAR it is unsettling.
DON’T FORGET PREHISTORIC WHALES, SOME OF THOSE FUCKERS WERE TERRIFYING
AMBULOCETUS WAS AMPHIBIOUS AND PRETTY BADASS
BASILOSAURUS WAS THIS GIANT REPTILIAN CETACEAN THAT PROBABLY SWAM LIKE A DUMB EEL BECAUSE OF ITS TINY FLUKES BUT THIS FUCKER WAS 60 FEET LONG AND AT THE TOP OF THE MARINE FOOD CHAIN
AND THEN THERE’S MY FAVORITE, ZYGOPHYSETER, WHICH WAS THIS HUGE EARLY SPERM WHALE THAT ATE SHARKS AND OTHER WHALES
IT WAS NOTHING BUT TEETH
The reason why the animals in the prehistoric times were so big was because there was much more oxygen in the atmosphere if I recall correctly. Because there was so much oxygen and so few carbon gasses, life on earth was able to grow to terrifying lengths and heights, don’t forget how giant the bugs were.
I have never seen so much prime nope in a single post
Actually the concentration of carbon gases were higher in prehistoric times, and reached their peak in the Cretaceous period where the co2 levels were nearly 2-3 times higher than today. It is theorized that they became so large and nasty because a warmer climate allowed for more growth because cold climates can’t sustain as much life. Currently we are just coming out of an ice age called the Pleistocene ice age and this ice age has been going on for the past 2.5 million years. The reason we don’t have these things around anymore is because the earth is recovering from this ice age.
|19.04.2007|
Siwon;“The doctor told us that there was no hope. I couldn’t believe that someone that I knew would quite possibly be dying.”
Leeteuk commented, “The van went in circles a few times before crashing to the ground. The van was spinning so fast that our faces were stuck to the side of the window. When we opened our eyes, our manager was yelling out loud that he wanted to commit suicide. When looking for the members, we found everyone except for Kyuhyun.”
Kyuhyun was found about 20-30m away from the vehicle. His clothes were all torn and looked as if he had fainted. Eunhyuk commented, “I ran over to him and asked for someone to call an ambulance. However, the reporters came first. Luckily someone that had been Shinhwa’s manager before helped us get an ambulance.”
When asked about the accident, Kyuhyun commented, “I don’t remember that moment. When I woke up I was on the ground. I couldn’t feel the bottom half of my body and I felt that I was going to die. When I woke up again I was in the hospital. When I asked how long I had been sleeping, they said 4 days. I stayed in the hospital for about 4-5 months.”
I’M GLAD THAT NOBODY DIED ON THAT HORRIBLE DAY
LOVE YOU GUYS ♥
